Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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