So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
