she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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