I want to make a zoo with you.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize
