What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
