I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
