there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
