it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Randomize
