we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize