Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I just googled if crying burns calories
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
