so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
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