Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
