they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
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