As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Randomize
