But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Randomize
