have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
