He is such a slut. More and more my type.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Oh god it's open bar.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize