Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
