woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
