I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Randomize
