i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Randomize
