i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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