pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Randomize
