why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
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