Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize