3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
She has the best kind of daddy issues
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
