Christians are straight up FREAKS
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
True strength comes from lack of pants
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
