So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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