I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
PS: I just woke up from my shower
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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