If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
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