break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
