my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Randomize
