this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
