im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
