I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
