Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
