Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
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