it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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