He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Randomize
