I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
