Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
