party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Randomize
