my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Randomize
