Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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