oh god the rape fog is back!
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
