I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
