let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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