do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
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