Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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