She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
Randomize
