But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Randomize
